Wednesday, 22 April 2009

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I went to see King Blues last night with Daisy and Antje. I'll be honest, I'd actually never heard of them before Daisy asked me to go with her, but bloody hell, they actually blew me away...
At the end, as an encore, the singer, Itch, came back on stage and performed this poem he'd written. I went and tracked it down and here it is, more for my benefit than anyone else's, because if it's here I know I'll never lose it! It really is amazing, especially when it's read out loud by the guy who wrote it...

Five Different Bottles Of Shampoo
She pushed in before me
In the supermarket queue
Pretending not to see me in that way women do
She put on the counter some bread and milk too
And then she pulled out five different bottles of shampoo
And I thought to myself “I will never understand women”
And I hear some of you saying “yeah but all men are the same,
They all think they’re so cool and they’re ruled by their dicks”
That might be true of me
But it aint true of all of us
So don’t point that finger so quick
I do see some of the blokes though
In the clubs pinching girls’ asses
Trying to be intimidating
Making obscene passes
Man she’s a goddess
You can tell by the way she dances
But then you call her a slag
When she don’t accept your advances
You just show you’ve got no respect for yourself
Show you aint got the balls to just talk to a girl
So when she chats to me
You spit at her and shout whore
But it is written in the art of war
To fight only the battles you can win
But I will defend your honour ‘til they kick my face in
If you had to scrape me
Broken bones, bruised, bloodied and battered up off the floor
Well fuck it
Integrity is what black eyes were invented for.
So down with the dick-tatorship
That are so cocksure
They use rape as a weapon of war
Fuck the man who thinks its ok to give his wife a punch
Fuck the judge who says it weren’t rape cos she was drunk
And if you’re pro life
I mean if you’re Pro – Life
Then become a doctor
Or foster a kid
Make it possible for people who are alive to live
But don’t you dare tell women what they can and can’t do
When it was a woman that gave life to you
Yes I’m a man, a fairly stereotypical one
But I aint afraid to say it
I think all women are beautiful and strong
Too fat, too thin
That’s just media spin
You look best when you’re comfortable in your own skin
So I’m sorry if we’ve made you feel undue
The truth be told I’m in all of you
You’re a giver of life and a warrior too
So do you really need
Five different bottles of shampoo?

Itch - the King Blues

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